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Behavioural Difficulties in Children

Bereavement & Grief

Bereavement is the experience of losing someone important to you. Grief is the emotional, psychological, and physical response to that loss. Whilst grief is a natural and universal human experience, it can also feel overwhelming, disorientating, and deeply painful.

 

There is no “normal” timeline for grief, and no right or wrong way to experience it. Some people feel intense emotions immediately, whilst others feel numb or disconnected for some time before emotions emerge. Grief can also change over time, often coming in waves rather than following a predictable pattern.

What can grief feel like?

Grief can affect emotional wellbeing, physical health, relationships, and daily functioning. Common experiences include:

 

Emotional reactions

  • Sadness or tearfulness

  • Numbness or shock

  • Anger or irritability

  • Guilt or regret

  • Anxiety, fear, or loneliness

 

Physical symptoms

  • Fatigue or exhaustion

  • Sleep difficulties

  • Changes in appetite

  • Tightness in the chest or physical heaviness

  • Difficulty concentrating

 

Cognitive experiences

  • Feeling detached or “foggy”

  • Replaying memories or conversations

  • Difficulty accepting the reality of the loss

  • Intrusive thoughts about the person who died

 

Behavioural changes

  • Withdrawing socially

  • Avoiding reminders of the loss

  • Becoming overly busy to distract from emotions

  • Finding everyday tasks more difficult

 

Many people also notice that grief can feel unpredictable, with strong emotions resurfacing unexpectedly around anniversaries, reminders, or important life events.

Complicated or prolonged grief

For some individuals, grief can become particularly persistent or overwhelming, making it difficult to adjust to life after the loss. This is sometimes referred to as complicated or prolonged grief.

 

This may be more likely following:

  • Sudden, traumatic, or unexpected bereavement

  • Loss of a child, partner, or very close family member

  • Multiple losses or cumulative grief

  • Lack of emotional support

  • Previous trauma or mental health difficulties

 

People experiencing prolonged grief may feel emotionally “stuck,” disconnected from others, or unable to imagine a meaningful future without the person they have lost.

How common is bereavement-related difficulty?

Bereavement affects everyone differently, though grief reactions are extremely common following the death of someone significant. Research suggests that around 7–10% of bereaved adults may experience prolonged grief symptoms that significantly affect day-to-day functioning and benefit from additional therapeutic support.

 

Recent clinical guidance also recognises that grief can increase vulnerability to difficulties such as anxiety, depression, trauma symptoms, sleep disturbance, and social withdrawal.

What treatment do we offer?

Support focuses on helping you process the loss, adjust to life after bereavement, and care for your emotional wellbeing at your own pace.

Grief-focused therapy

Therapy can provide a safe, compassionate space to:

  • Talk openly about your loss

  • Process painful thoughts and emotions

  • Explore the meaning and impact of the relationship

  • Adjust gradually to life after bereavement

Emotional regulation support

Children may benefit from learning skills around:

  • Identifying emotions

  • Managing overwhelm safely

  • Calming techniques and coping strategies

  • Building frustration tolerance

  • Developing confidence and resilience

Cognitive Behavioural Therapy (CBT)

CBT may help where grief becomes complicated by:

  • Persistent guilt or self-blame

  • Anxiety or panic

  • Avoidance of reminders or situations

  • Depression, hopelessness, or loss of motivation

Compassion-Focused Therapy (CFT)

CFT can support:

  • Developing self-compassion during periods of intense pain

  • Reducing shame or harsh self-criticism

  • Creating a greater sense of emotional safety

Acceptance and Commitment Therapy (ACT)

ACT focuses on:

  • Learning to carry grief rather than “move on” from it

  • Making space for painful emotions

  • Reconnecting gradually with meaning, values, and relationships

Trauma-focused support

Where a bereavement was traumatic or distressing, therapy may also involve:

  • Processing traumatic memories

  • Reducing intrusive thoughts or flashbacks

  • Supporting emotional and nervous system regulation

A compassionate note

Grief often changes shape over time, but loss can leave a lasting impact. Many people worry they are grieving “incorrectly” or feel pressure to cope better than they are. In reality, grief is deeply personal, and healing rarely happens in a straight line. With the right support, it is possible to process loss, care for yourself compassionately, and gradually find ways to move forward whilst still maintaining a meaningful connection to the person you have lost.

Further support and resources

You may find these trusted organisations helpful:

https://www.cruse.org.uk/

https://www.thegoodgrieftrust.org/

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