top of page

Home  >> Problems  >>

Low Self Esteem

Low Self-Esteem

Self-esteem refers to how we see, evaluate, and relate to ourselves. When self-esteem is low, this often involves a tendency to judge ourselves harshly, focus on perceived flaws, and doubt our worth or abilities.

 

This might show up as:

  • Persistent self-criticism or a harsh inner voice

  • Comparing yourself negatively to others

  • Feeling “not good enough” in areas such as work, relationships, or appearance

  • Difficulty recognising strengths or achievements

  • Fear of making mistakes or getting things wrong

 

Low self-esteem often develops over time and can be shaped by early experiences, relationships, cultural expectations, and significant life events. It is not fixed — it can shift and improve with the right support and understanding.

 

You may notice:

  • Avoiding challenges or new opportunities

  • Difficulty making decisions or trusting your judgement

  • Expecting criticism or rejection from others

  • Struggling to ask for help or express your needs

  • Being drawn into relationships where your needs are not fully met

 

These patterns can understandably affect confidence, relationships, and overall wellbeing, sometimes contributing to anxiety or low mood.

How common is low self-esteem?

Low self-esteem is very common and exists on a spectrum:

  • Many people report periods of reduced self-confidence, particularly during times of stress or transition

  • It is a key feature in a range of difficulties, including anxiety, depression, and eating-related concerns

  • Surveys suggest that a large majority of people experience self-doubt at times, though persistent and distressing low self-esteem affects a smaller proportion

 

(Recent psychological research and UK mental health reports, 2022–2024)

What treatment can we offer?

Support focuses on helping you develop a more balanced, realistic, and compassionate relationship with yourself — rather than simply “thinking positively.”

Cognitive Behavioural Therapy (CBT)

CBT can help to:

  • Identify and gently challenge unhelpful beliefs about yourself

  • Recognise thinking patterns such as self-criticism or comparison

  • Test out new perspectives and behaviours in a practical way


Practical strategies may include:

  • Learning to express needs and boundaries more clearly

  • Gradually facing avoided situations

  • Building confidence through experience rather than perfection

Compassion-Focused Therapy (CFT)

CFT is particularly effective for low self-esteem. It focuses on:

  • Understanding the origins of self-criticism

  • Developing a kinder, more supportive inner voice

  • Reducing shame and building a sense of inner safety

Acceptance and Commitment Therapy (ACT)

ACT supports:

  • Stepping back from critical thoughts rather than getting caught in them

  • Building a life guided by personal values, not self-doubt

  • Increasing confidence through meaningful action

Schema Therapy

This approach explores:

  • Long-standing patterns or “schemas” formed in earlier life

  • How these influence current self-beliefs and relationships

  • Ways to shift deeply rooted beliefs over time

Mindfulness-based approaches

These can help you:

  • Notice self-critical thoughts without automatically believing them

  • Develop a more balanced awareness of yourself

  • Reduce rumination and overthinking

A compassionate note

Low self-esteem is not a personal failing — it often reflects patterns that developed for understandable reasons over time. With the right support, it is possible to relate to yourself differently: with more balance, confidence, and self-respect.

Further support

You may find these trusted UK resources helpful:

  • Mind – information on self-esteem and practical support

https://www.mind.org.uk/information-support/types-of-mental-health-problems/self-esteem/

  • NHS – advice on improving confidence and wellbeing

https://www.nhs.uk/mental-health/self-help/tips-and-support/raise-low-self-esteem/

https://www.cci.health.wa.gov.au/Resources/Looking-After-Yourself/Self-Esteem

bottom of page